Nostalgia

I found my alter ego
walking naked through the desert
wearing combat boots and carrying a laptop with a half dead battery.
She was sunburned and grinning
said, Have you seen these cholla spines?
before spinning in circles to mark out a labyrinth.
It was back then the beginning of the nineties
and rebellion hadn’t found the internet
or headphones or streaming
so read books and smoked weed
when not inhaling glues meant for home craft projects.
This was back before knitting was ironic
back when dialup was a connection
and the cool kids with money broke their ankles
on the way back from skiing.

Miss me? said my alter ego.
Take a closer look, squinting.
You never know what’s coming.
You never know what’s still there.

2019.01.27

Have spent the morning re-reading some of my old writing – I’d planned to pull together poems for Coastside but have done this instead.

Some of it – the essays, the various topics, even my old time management book, even a few fiction fragments – is better than I’d thought!

Not sure what this tells me. Right now I’m coming back to writing stuff about once a week; this amount of time seems possible, but I wonder if I’m losing time to having to remind myself what I’ve already got.

I’ve also got writing scattered across two locations: my Mac, often in Scrivener, and the cloud, largely in txt files. At one point I loved Scrivener’s UI loveliness, and its flexibility of options appealed to me – but at this point in time I’m more in the realm of txt files, and their straightforward structure. This feels like a throwback to when I first wrote on computers, pulling together high school essays on my Dad’s old Victor 9000s with the green glowing screens and the heavy whirring floppy drives. Formatting things to print was a pain but the focus on the text was deep and fun. I miss that green.

More recently, I miss my old tiny Chromebook, with its clicky keyboard and its throwaway sturdiness. There’s a certain irony to finding common experience between text files on a pre-Windows desktop, and txt files in Drive – but that’s what I’m doing.

A January Experiment: Focused Deep Work

Late in November of last year, I took on some new responsibilities at work. My team grew. My role grew. The amount of stuff I’m responsible for grew.

I’m going to have to do some things differently.

So in January, I’m going to experiment.

First, I overhauled my schedule so that I can have a solid block of focused work time each day, mostly first thing in the morning. Making this happen took an amazing (to me, anyway) two hours of focused effort on overhauling my calendar – but while I was at it, I also built in three visits to the gym, two long walks, and a preset day to work from the San Francisco office. This is all weekly, so it gives me a lot more predictability, and I feel good about having that work time to look forward to.

Second, over time I’ve gradually reduced my own multitasking. If I’m in a meeting, I don’t take my laptop, just a notebook and pen. This reduces the temptation to check email, especially becauseā€¦

Third, I’ve turned off all email and chat notifications on my phone. I’ve also decided not to check email until after my daily focused work time.

So that’s January! I’m looking forward to seeing how it goes. I’m hoping that in combination, these changes will lead me to get more thoughtful work done, at a greater level of depth, while feeling less scattered.

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